Like many born and raised in the Midwest, Erika Hayden strives to be that perfect mix of spirited and endearing. She enjoys challenging people’s perceptions and expectation using both tried and true methods as well as those that are novel and shocking. Her most notable achievements in this field include: disliking chocolate, caramel and everything pumpkin spice, preferring full contact sports to shopping, making even the most innocent and mundane sentence into a double entendre /pun  /innuendo /euphemism (or a delightful orgy of all those), having complete conversations using movie & tv quotes, and being a foul-mouthed intellectual.

Erika stunned the world by giving birth to a child that likes to talk even more than she does (usually while ricocheting off the walls) and who, like his mother, enjoys “enticing and confusing” others—his words. One would presume this leaves her little time or energy to do much else, and they would be absolutely correct. For that reason, should you know of a man both eager and capable of handling such a treasure of a woman, please send him to the Mitten. Serious inquiries only. Must be able to speak/text in complete sentences. No baseball, Ohio State or Alabama fans (that should weed out most of the weird ones). Should the mood strike you, you can find her online or wandering the woods (for best results, bait your traps with tacos or sushi).